Thursday, January 21, 2010

the Jersey Shore filter: checking in on my Match experience

Number of days on Match: 22
Number of days in Match subscription: 31
Number of e-mails exchanged: 4?
Number of dates: 0

Yeah, those aren't good stats but I'm not trying the way I have before. I've become quite disgruntled with the site and have been more picky and have not been putting in as much effort these days. I just winked at a couple of people and have sent a couple of introductory e-mails today but other than that thems slim pickins. I'm just more choosy these days and I love the filter option. I won't lie, I do filter - not just by location and by height but also by occupation. If I want to I can also filter by religion, political views, body type and whether they want kids. But I generally don't do blanket filter for those things and consider the entire profile before making those calls. But some things you just can't get over... Here are some filters I wish Match had:

the Jersey Shore filter: I really wish there was a filter for all the spray tanned, tight shirt, and even shirtless guys. They sometimes take you by surprise. Sometimes everything looks kosher until you see the greasy hair, the abs, the slimy looking photos. NO thanks.

the slim & toned/slender filter: I wish Match let you filter based on your potential Match's date wish list. I've ranted about this before. So at the risk of looking like a bitter man hater, I'll refrain and just link you all to that post.

the girls in the photo filter: I would hate to be the girl who discovers some guy is posting pictures of me with him on an online dating site. Sometimes these girls appear to be sisters. In fact one guy even said the girl in the photo was his sister. But how hard is it to cut a photo? And how hard is it to select a photo that does not show you cut out a girl hanging all over you while you pose with a beer in hand? I once went on a date with a guy who had included a photo with a girl. I didn't see this until after I agreed to the date and didn't have a good feeling about it but went anyway. I asked him about it and he said it was his ex-girlfriend. Check please!

the catch-phrase filter: If you've ever tried online dating you know the standards. Everyone says they love to travel. Everyone says they're looking for a girl who loves to go out but is equally as comfortable cuddling up on the couch with a movie. Everyone says they're looking for an outgoing girl who likes to have fun. Sure some of these things are preference driven but I see a request for someone who isn't too serious and likes to have fun and see myself being ditched after date three because I won't put out. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm reading too much into it. Some guys are subtly honest though. My favorite was a guy who said he would love to have a dog but is too immature for one. Good for him for being honest. He'll find someone equally as immature and they can stare at puppies through pet store windows.

I know all my posts portray me as a negative Nancy. I jest a lot because it is fun and funny but in reality I obviously wouldn't be doing this if I didn't believe in the smallest chance that it will work for me. A good friend of mine is happily dating a guy she met online. One of my co-workers met her wonderful husband online. It does happen. I just have to filter through until I find the right one or until he walks by me on the street causing me to forget this whole online dating thing ever happened.

For those of you who have tried online dating any filters you'd like to add?

If you've missed it check out my other posts about my recent experience.


Ms. M said...

Your Jersey Shore filter is too funny! (I am currently refusing to accept a co-worker's facebook friend request until he puts on a shirt in his profile photo--ew!)

I think being choosy is a good thing. You deserve someone awesome.

MCW said...

I think there should be a filter that will weed out any shirtless guys (like the Jersey Shore one. Also one that takes out guys who post scenery pics. I don't care about the sunset you have seen. I have seen one too!

I am on match. I go back and forth with "trying." I guess you never know!

Anonymous said...

The Jersy Shore filter is classic. I want the Dirty Pervert filter. I once exchanged numbers with a guy after MULTIPLE emails and one of the first things he does is talk dirty to me. Uh, I'll pass, thanks!

DSS said...

You sound like you have a great perspective on all of this. Not taking it overly seriously, but making some effort.

When I was on MDC I tried really hard, and communicated bunches, and then got burnt out on terrible matches. Then I backed off, and they seemed to start coming out of the woodwork.

I totally agree that it CAN work. It's just a matter of whether or not the "right" person is signed up at the same time that you are. Grrr... a bit frustrating for sure!

a boy a girl and a pug said...

cracking up at the jersey shore filter...too funny!

TudorCity Girl said...

Haha. Jersey Shore filter!! I hear you with that. With all of it lately. Your latest stats remind me of mine when I was online. But the thing is, it will all work out some way or another. Like you said-either online (after all, we all know somebody who met their boyfriend/husband online) or in a wonderful, unexpected way as you go about your daily life in this crazy city. Sort of how it happened to me- when you least expect it.
You've got a great perspective on this and more patience than I ever did with online sites. Someday soon you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Unlucky Lucy said...

Haha...omg I hate when people have tons of photos with girls! I immediately filtered them out. (or sent them a message advising them to take them down!) It's like they're trying to scream "See...girls like me! I'm not gross at all! And yeah, whatever I paid those hooters girls to act nice and smile, but you don't need to know that!"