Saturday, April 23, 2011

tonight

I started out tonight feeling sorry for myself...

Sorry that I don't have family here to hang out with. That I don't have a significant other to guarantee that I almost-always have plans on a day like today when there were no special plans. Sorry that I didn't have a job tonight to occupy my downtime and make me some extra cash.

Sorry that I had no plans. Sorry that I didn't even really feel like seeking out plans with friends if it meant going out and spending money, braving potential rain, yada yada yada.

I was so easy to please today. I wasn't feeling contrary at all.

When it came to my attention tonight (as I was watching Bend it Like Beckham on IFC, I might add... I love that movie.) that I something unusual was about to happen, I became intrigued.

Tonight would be the first time in a long, long time that I would be home, in my house, alone. For an extended period of time.

I know I've mentioned it here before. I have three female roommates. I have my own bedroom, my own space and domain, but at any given time there is always someone home with me--or the potential of someone coming home. Roommate switches have happened lately and I have two new people with two new schedules living in my home. One is gone for the weekend and the other two roomies went out tonight...

I'm home alone!

Once I realized I could make fun of my lonely night I begrudgingly embraced it. I started by going to the gym and sweating out some of my frustrations. (Oh yes, I have become a gym rat. I gave in. I'm loving it. It is so very, very good for me.) When I came home I decided I was going to take a bath in our tub. I've never taken a bath in this tub. So I cleaned it first (Yeah, as I mentioned, three roommates!) and finished my book. It was lovely.

The rest of my night has been spent doing some light web browsing, eating a spot of dinner, and watching The Ten Commandments on TV. (I'd like to add an 11th commandment: Thou Shalt Not Overact.) After I'm done here I'll likely read until I get tired enough to fall asleep.

Tomorrow is Easter. I've got plans with friends for brunch and a movie.

I need to learn to embrace the solitude sometimes. Relax in the moment. Not make something out of good nothings. Tonight was a good start.

1 comment:

a boy a girl and a pug said...

i love what you said about making nothing out of good somethings...it's my oprah aha moment for the day. hope you had a great easter!