Am currently obsessing about something silly. Must stop.
I have a charity happy hour planned for tonight. I've been looking forward to it for about a month. I paid for the cover and then extra for raffle tickets. I have my fingers crossed for the JetBlue tickets. Hello, vacay! The problem is simple, it is the afternoon of and I simply do not. want. to. go.
I'm used to doing things alone by now and have gone to many a Happy Hour alone - example, another charity happy hour I went to back in June at which I thought I was going to stay 20 mins. I ended up shutting the event down. At 10 pm, don't get excited. But tonight, as I am still minus one, the option doesn't seem quite as enticing as when I reserved my spot a month or so ago. Plus it is all the way downtown. I'd have to get on the subway. Whine. Whine.
The real reason behind all this is that I've had a bad week. Last night, I couldn't wait to retreat to my bed, my remote and Under the Tuscan Sun on AMC. Note to self: buy Tuscan villa ASAP. I can hear the whispers of Oxygen and Lifetime and the call of a vegetarian burrito with extra hot sauce. I yearn for my pjs. If I'm gonna be alone I want to do it on my turf, not in a bar where I make small talk over loud music. I'm just not feeling the "alone in NY thing" today. I'll come back tomorrow.
Buuuuuuuuuut I did sign up for this. If I don't show, the money still goes to the charity so it is just a charitable donation but I paid extra for those stinkin' raffle tickets. And the clincher - I don't want to regret not going. This could pull me out of the funky mood I can't seem to shake. I could end up closing it down again.
My decision deadline is 5 pm, at which point I will clock out with a destination in mind. T-minus 32 mins... It really shouldn't be this hard...
I'm in a funky place.
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